All you need is love, love, love.

This morning, I woke from the most vivid, terrifying, horror-ridden nightmare. Seriously, it was evil, or so it felt.

It left a bad taste in my mouth and made me feel weary, almost attacked.

I went out to the living room to do some yoga and spend some time with God. I looked at the Bible and contemplated reading, however Loralie's cries of wakefulness distracted me and I pushed it aside.

After I fed and changed Loralie and got everything ready to go so that I could have more time to play with her before going to the salon, Loralie began to cry. She knew I was going to, at some point, leave her. It. Broke. My. Heart. I began to cry-this does not happen often.

I played and played with my chubby munchkin until I realized it was time to load up the car and head out. Loralie. Was. NOT. Having it. I felt so bad and all I wanted to do was sit and cry with her.

Alas, I did not.

I dropped Loralie off at my friends house and told my loving, sweet friend how I was feeling. Now she is pretty intuitive and listens the still voice that speaks to her. She looked at me with question in her face and said "Ok, Michelle? I know this may sound weird, so please do not think this in the wrong way if I am not right, ok? But, did you do your devotion today?" I quickly responded "Oh, yeah of course I did!" After I left I realized I fibbed. I did NOT do my devotion, duh! I meant to. Meant to is not the same as doing. I did not take action.

Anyhow, as I drove away feeling sorry for myself and the downfalls of the day to come I cried out to God to help me. Me. Me. ME. That was all that I could think of.

Me, I do not want to leave Loralie.

Me, I do not like missing my daughter's firsts.

Me, I do not want to leave.

Me. ME. MEEE.

I felt His whisper, more like a merciful, loving reminder that sometimes life is not about ME, but the people that will be impacted by me, via Him. I was humbled.

Life. It is not about me me me, or you you you. It is about a bigger picture where the purpose of your day is not defined my deadlines to make and places to be, but being true, honest, sincere exporters of God's love. We are CALLED to love. We are CALLED to give of our TIME to LOVE.

This is something I plan to pay more attention to tomorrow.

p.s. a random bit of news. Husband and I have decided to eat sandwiches for the next month to conserve energy. We are both too exhausted by the end of the day to make a pretty meal (although I am a fan of healthy pretty meals). I think I shall call this next month, The Sandwich Diaries!

Blessings!